The cuke that wasn't a cuke

God's Warrior · The cuke that wasn't a cuke

Gardenwife
Aug 08, 2005

This spring, Horseshoe sent me several veggie plants in the mail. In with the peppers and tomatoes were a couple of cucumber plants. One was a bush cuke and the other, unlabeled, he said was a lemon cuke.

I've battled powdery mildew on my poor cukes, spraying them carefully with baking soda and dish soap dissolved in water, as suggested. We got two cukes from the bush cuke plant, but all its leaves are turned to dust and I don't hold much hope for the tiny other fruit to develop any further.

The lemon cuke seemed to be doing great despite the powdery leaves. It started forming fruit and I was so excited! He said they'd be ripe when they got the size of golf balls (tennis balls?) and turned yellow.

They keep growing, but not fading to yellow. As a matter of fact, they look like little watermelons...

So, I wrote to Shoe and he told me this:

Hah! Nope, not a cuke! If that is about the size of a tennis ball or so it is a "plumgranny"!...A plumgranny (a.k.a. "Queen Anne's pocket melon") is not a very edible veggie...they were used in the bygone days when people didn't bathe so much and were carried in people's folds in their robes/pockets to mask their body odor.

Let it get a tan color before you pick it (or let it get "overly ripe")...it has a great smell and you'll see why those folks used it for said purpose!

So, not only have I been babying this plant under the assumption I could actually eat its fruit, but now he tells me we stink!

LOL!! Just kiddin' Shoe. It is pretty funny, though. I knew those couldn't be cukes!

God's Warrior

Elena
That is one of the delights of gardening to me, the joys of the unexpected. You have probably had more fun with that "no stinkie" fruit than you could have ever had with a mere cucumber. Heck, you can just go buy a cucumber but nobody but you has got a plumgranny, except maybe Shoe.

Gardenwife
True! Both my grannies were a real sweethearts, more like peachgranny.

Elena
I had one granny that was a peach granny and one that was a lemon granny.
Tee hee!

shazbot3
A plumgranny. Ok. And I thought I'd heard everything. GW, you have just GOT to save me some of those seeds! I pride myself on growing what no one else around here does-I love it when folks stop by and say,"What IS that???" I would love to be able to tell them the plumgranny story.

Please?? I'll trade you something else strange for a few Smile

And 'Shoe, only YOU would have come up with this 'un. You ain't right, boy Smile

Gardenwife
You're welcome to some seeds, Shaz, just remind me.

shazbot3
Yay!!! Thank ya, GW Smile

Horseshoe
HAH!!! Hilarious!

I sent so many plants out this year I think I'm entitled to messing up every so often, eh? :>)

(Now my mind is a'thinkin'...if Kimberley didn't get a lemon cucumber but got a plumgranny, then somebody else out there didn't get a plumgranny but received a lemon cucumber...AND IS WALKING AROUND WITH IT IN THEIR POCKET, STINKING!)

Today I was at the garden north of town and took a pic of the plumgrannies. Here is what they look like when matured.

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God's Warrior

Elena
To quote a great man I know....."Ya'll ain't right!"

Gardenwife
Are those the noxious weeds that grow down by the shore in Louisiana? They sure look similar...No, actually, their fruit was a little smaller and solid orangy-yellow.

Mary
Oh my, a plumgranny! Who'd a thunk it?

smiln32
This is just the funniest thread I've seen in ages.

Gardenwife
We thought it was really funny, too! I did a little Googling about these things... http://www.uga.edu/~ebl/sm/plant/plant.htm#plu

Some folks actually eat them. I'll have to try one, of course.

Mine are getting about 5" long now, and still dark green. How long until they start turning yellow, I wonder. I root pruned the tomatoes last night...Should I do that to the melons or just be patient?

Horseshoe Guess you can't see the ones in my picture too good. G.when I pick some I'll take some close-up shots.

Gardenwife
Lance and his wife Bethany at the farmer's market got a chuckle out of the story today. Wink

Look at his hot sauce labels -- those are his kids! LOL

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God's Warrior

shazbot3
Cool, guys! Now I know what to look for as far as ripe n' ready plumgrannies.
GW, those hot sauce bottles are too cute, lol.

Gardenwife
Howie's impressed by the habanero sauce. He mixed a couple teaspoons in with a little bowl of medium salsa ...And it was HOT. Each time he'd finish some, he was beaded in sweat and saying "hooooooooo".
Wink

Kimberley

Elena
Maybe some of that heat will get to his back and make it feel better. Ya never can tell! It has to go somewhere! LOL

shazbot3
Hmm, sounds like my kinda hot sauce!!!!!!!!!

Elena
Don't you know that stuff will burn out your insides and then you will have to get new plastic ones?

Gardenwife
Maybe that's what he's hoping for! LOL

He put some on his sausage and cabbage today and exclaimed several times how hot it was. When he was done, there was a little bite of cabbage on his plate. Totally without thinking, I popped it in my mouth. It didn't stay there long! My eyes popped wide open and I quickly got it the heck off my tongue. Howie burst out laughing, while I went in search of something to quell the fire!

Elena
That sounds like a major fire to me. I would have just died on the spot. I don't know how the heck they can stand it, do you? Cast iron mouths and stomachs is all I can figure!

Gardenwife
It caught up with him...He also had several jalepeno peppers today. Got himself a tummy ache. **wicked grin**

Elena
His stomach was just on fire!

God's Warrior

Gardenwife

Okay, Shoe - is plumgranny still your final word?
.

Yep...still my final word!

Just came home from picking a few this morning. They range in size from 2 to just over 4 inches. These are what they look like when "ripe".

God's Warrior

Gardenwife
Aha! Well, good then. This one's getting more orangey today.

shazbot3
'Shoe, do you know if these can be dried like gourds?

Gardenwife
I picked the one which was turning orange. It has a pleasant scent, but not as strong as I thought it might. Maybe I picked it too soon?

Horseshoe
Shaz, so far they just end up rotting, most likely cus of the seeds and mush that is inside them; gourds tend to have more airspace inside and that's probably why they won't rot as easily. Maybe you could try hollowing them out though and stuffing them with something (sand? powdered milk, wax paper) to help them hold their shape, then let them slowly dry like that?

GW, yep...some of mine aren't as fragrant as others. It seems to me that the softer they get the more fragrance they have.

Gardenwife
I'll leave the next few I see turning on the vine a little longer.

shazbot3
Good idea, 'Shoe. Maybe I could hollow them out and put the silica sand we use for drying flowers inside them. That may just work.
What kind of fragrance do they have? Is it fruity, or musky, or what?

Gardenwife
Melony. Sort of.

Gardenwife
I left one on the vine longer this time and picked it today. It smelled nice, but not so strong I'd probably notice it unless it was up by my nose.

Since I came through Nancy's apartment when returning from the garden, I left the melon on the steps so I'd not forget it when I brought up the laundry. Well, I forgot it down there and also left the basement door open when I came back upstairs.

Not to worry, though, because Emma went downstairs to visit grandma and when she came up...I heard a thump-thump. Then she came trotting into the office with her new, fragrant ball.

God's Warrior

Gardenwife
It kept wanting to roll away, but she pursued it with what can only be called dogged determination.

Gardenwife
I thought they tasted pretty bland, not good at all. But Emma, well, she was impressed.

Gardenwife
When I took it from her, I had her rapt attention, let me tell you!

God's Warrior

Gardenwife
Ohhhh, come to mamma...

Gardenwife
Sarah liked it, too. She slurped out the middle when I held it out to her.

God's Warrior

Gardenwife
Both girls, Sarah especially, seem to be a little uncomfortable. I think the melon isn't setting too well in their tummies. *sigh*

They're not toxic, for they're related to honeydew and cantaloupe and the girls eat bites of them whenever I have some...But I think we may have some gastric distress going on. May be a long night!

P.S. They seem okay, but Sarah's panting more than usual and it's cool in the office, anyway. I think maybe I'll hold off on giving them their dinner.

Elena
Love those pictures. Sorry they aren't digesting them too well. Maybe it is like me and eggplant. I love them but they give me an upset stomach every time I eat them.

Gardenwife
Well, they've had a lite supper (their "nighty bities" as we call it) and seem okay.

Elena
You just may wind up outside several times tonight, however. Good luck cause I know you have to drive tomorrow and need your rest.

shazbot3
Thanks for the scent description, GW. Those pictures of your girls are adorable-especially the one of Emma in the hallway Smile

Mary
Awwww, that's a doggone shame. (I just couldn't resist.) Snicker.